Double Yuck!
I am really beginning to think everyone who has ooohed and ahhhed over 24 for lo these many seasons was being brainwashed by their televisions. Because I'm sorry, but this season hasn't been that great. I liked (really liked) James Cromwell as Jack Bauer's manipulative, murderous father (but then, I love Cromwell's acting, and he proved he could be a great bad guy in LA Confidential) but, other than that, this season has been pretty wishy-washy.
First you have Jack's stock "If you don't do X (or tell me Y) I'm going to torture and/or kill you" response. If I had a dollar for every time he has uttered one of the combinations above this season, I could go to dinner at 21.
Then you have the hellaciously bad acting of both President Palmer Jr. and the president's really annoying sister.
Then you have the Muslim chick is the Mole (no she's not). Or is she? Because if you have me arrested for something and then say, "D'oh! Sorry 'bout that. But we really need you. Come back to work," my response would be, "I don't think so, but I'll see you in court!"
And you have Morris getting whiny and feeling sorry for himself. (Which, to be fair, he seems to have stopped since Chloe told him to stuff it.)
Now, we have a triple threat:
1. Jean Smart stabbed her ex-husband, used to be president Logan, 3 weeks ago, and we have yet to learn whether he lived or died, or whether she will face criminal charges for that little stunt.
2. Rainman comes to 24. Yes, last night, we discover that Brian Krakow (***) is alive and well, and seems to have gotten over Claire Danes. He got a haircut (thank God) but seems to have gotten dumber. His brother, however, is (apparently) autistic, and can hack into anywhere to get anything , but doesn't understand the implications of the above. So Brian has turned to a life of crime, supplying Gredenko with something he needs to make the nukes go boom. He gets arrested, and Jack uses the autistic brother to make the drop (which, by the way, was the only "hold your breath" scene in the entire episode).
Can I just say that, since autistic people seem to be money-making machines, I want one! I mean, first you have Rainman himself, counting cards in Vegas, and now you have this guy, the hacker extraordinaire. DJ, you should be harvesting your autistic children's talents - you could retire early!
3. And this is the Creme de la Creme. President Palmer has been in a hospital-induced coma for the past 2 weeks, having almost been blown up by MacGyver's homemade bomb. This means that the VP has been in charge. He has apparently watched Dr. Strangelove one too many times, and is just a little eager to bomb whatever the hell country Al-Fayed is from (no word yet on whether he's actually planning to ride the bomb while it launches). So Karen Hayes gets the annoying sister to get the doctor to de-comafy the President. President Palmer comes out of the coma and is lucid and decisive, all within less than an hour. Apparently, being in a coma will also cause wimpy characters to grow a spine, because this is the strongest and most decisive I have ever seen this character be, as he tells the VP that HE is in charge, and the VP can just back off.
Now look. I realize it's television and not reality, but still. He had all this swelling on his brain. My aunt had a brain aneurysim last year and they did surgery. She was unconscious/semi-conscious for a couple of weeks, and had a nasty case of ICU psychosis (she tried to orchestrate an escape from the hospital and demanded that my young cousin and I help her get out of there - it was actually pretty funny - we took to calling her The Big X, after the movie The Great Escape) so I feel fairly confident when I say: CRAP! That storyline is CRAP! Swelling on the brain isn't something you wake up from in less than an hour, and you are coherent and decisive and in charge. No way. So, even though the VP is clearly taking orders from Old Scratch himself, I must say that I agree with the VP about trying to take over the country temporarily.
***Brian Krakow was a character on the too short-lived show My So-Called Life about 10 years ago. He was the brainy kid with the blond white boy 'fro who had a giant crush on Angela, played by Claire Danes. I haven't seen him in much of anything since then. As a matter of fact, most of the actors on that show seem to have fallen off the face of the earth, with the exception of Jared Leto and Claire herself, who can currently be seen in the new Gap commerical.
Meanwhile, The Black Donnellys was brief but glorious, and I am already over it. I'm sorry, but I have personal experience with a family member who, although not as big a screw-up as Jimmy Donnelly is, has been a sore trial to the family, and at some point, you just have to let them stand or fall on their own. And in this case, it was the making of my kin. But you have Tommy, the smart one, (I don't know the actor, but I first saw him in an episode of CSI a couple years ago, and he was awesome) who could be something, who just keeps treading though molasses because every time he pulls brother Jimmy out of a mess, Jimmy turns around and gets himself embroiled in another, bigger mess. It's so frustrating I want reach into the television and throttle him. And he's really the only redeemable character on the show. Besides the screw-up brother, you have Kevin, who apparently blows with the wind. Then you have Sean, who got beaten up in the first episode and is now fretting because he thinks he's not pretty any more. So, yeah, at this rate, this will be a one-season show, unless they decide to give me a reason to CARE about any of these guys.
Last night was so bad I actually caught myself flipping channels to PAX, to watch parts of a re-run of Diagnosis Murder, while 24 was on. Seriously. (I just adore Dick Van Dyke!)
First you have Jack's stock "If you don't do X (or tell me Y) I'm going to torture and/or kill you" response. If I had a dollar for every time he has uttered one of the combinations above this season, I could go to dinner at 21.
Then you have the hellaciously bad acting of both President Palmer Jr. and the president's really annoying sister.
Then you have the Muslim chick is the Mole (no she's not). Or is she? Because if you have me arrested for something and then say, "D'oh! Sorry 'bout that. But we really need you. Come back to work," my response would be, "I don't think so, but I'll see you in court!"
And you have Morris getting whiny and feeling sorry for himself. (Which, to be fair, he seems to have stopped since Chloe told him to stuff it.)
Now, we have a triple threat:
1. Jean Smart stabbed her ex-husband, used to be president Logan, 3 weeks ago, and we have yet to learn whether he lived or died, or whether she will face criminal charges for that little stunt.
2. Rainman comes to 24. Yes, last night, we discover that Brian Krakow (***) is alive and well, and seems to have gotten over Claire Danes. He got a haircut (thank God) but seems to have gotten dumber. His brother, however, is (apparently) autistic, and can hack into anywhere to get anything , but doesn't understand the implications of the above. So Brian has turned to a life of crime, supplying Gredenko with something he needs to make the nukes go boom. He gets arrested, and Jack uses the autistic brother to make the drop (which, by the way, was the only "hold your breath" scene in the entire episode).
Can I just say that, since autistic people seem to be money-making machines, I want one! I mean, first you have Rainman himself, counting cards in Vegas, and now you have this guy, the hacker extraordinaire. DJ, you should be harvesting your autistic children's talents - you could retire early!
3. And this is the Creme de la Creme. President Palmer has been in a hospital-induced coma for the past 2 weeks, having almost been blown up by MacGyver's homemade bomb. This means that the VP has been in charge. He has apparently watched Dr. Strangelove one too many times, and is just a little eager to bomb whatever the hell country Al-Fayed is from (no word yet on whether he's actually planning to ride the bomb while it launches). So Karen Hayes gets the annoying sister to get the doctor to de-comafy the President. President Palmer comes out of the coma and is lucid and decisive, all within less than an hour. Apparently, being in a coma will also cause wimpy characters to grow a spine, because this is the strongest and most decisive I have ever seen this character be, as he tells the VP that HE is in charge, and the VP can just back off.
Now look. I realize it's television and not reality, but still. He had all this swelling on his brain. My aunt had a brain aneurysim last year and they did surgery. She was unconscious/semi-conscious for a couple of weeks, and had a nasty case of ICU psychosis (she tried to orchestrate an escape from the hospital and demanded that my young cousin and I help her get out of there - it was actually pretty funny - we took to calling her The Big X, after the movie The Great Escape) so I feel fairly confident when I say: CRAP! That storyline is CRAP! Swelling on the brain isn't something you wake up from in less than an hour, and you are coherent and decisive and in charge. No way. So, even though the VP is clearly taking orders from Old Scratch himself, I must say that I agree with the VP about trying to take over the country temporarily.
***Brian Krakow was a character on the too short-lived show My So-Called Life about 10 years ago. He was the brainy kid with the blond white boy 'fro who had a giant crush on Angela, played by Claire Danes. I haven't seen him in much of anything since then. As a matter of fact, most of the actors on that show seem to have fallen off the face of the earth, with the exception of Jared Leto and Claire herself, who can currently be seen in the new Gap commerical.
Meanwhile, The Black Donnellys was brief but glorious, and I am already over it. I'm sorry, but I have personal experience with a family member who, although not as big a screw-up as Jimmy Donnelly is, has been a sore trial to the family, and at some point, you just have to let them stand or fall on their own. And in this case, it was the making of my kin. But you have Tommy, the smart one, (I don't know the actor, but I first saw him in an episode of CSI a couple years ago, and he was awesome) who could be something, who just keeps treading though molasses because every time he pulls brother Jimmy out of a mess, Jimmy turns around and gets himself embroiled in another, bigger mess. It's so frustrating I want reach into the television and throttle him. And he's really the only redeemable character on the show. Besides the screw-up brother, you have Kevin, who apparently blows with the wind. Then you have Sean, who got beaten up in the first episode and is now fretting because he thinks he's not pretty any more. So, yeah, at this rate, this will be a one-season show, unless they decide to give me a reason to CARE about any of these guys.
Last night was so bad I actually caught myself flipping channels to PAX, to watch parts of a re-run of Diagnosis Murder, while 24 was on. Seriously. (I just adore Dick Van Dyke!)
posted by The Big Seester | 1:40 PM
3 Comments:
Perhaps you are just not training them correctly. Television is, after all, completely realistic, and if THEY SAY that autistic people can be trained to hack into major high-security military websites, and your kids can't, then they clearly are not living up to their potential.
Based on what I saw last night, Brian Krakow told his brother repeatedly: "I always take care of you, don't I? Then you need to do this for me."
So perhaps your kids are just a little too secure in your household. Have a contest, and only the winner gets dinner.
They'll tone up those autism skills really fast!
Pfft.
TBS
DJ,
Exactly! PhD - what does that even MEAN?! And wouldn't you like to see some of that $$$ recouped?
You know, I have a hard time watching Claire Danes because I liked the show so much, and then she bailed on it. I thought it was really unprofessional of her at the time, and have yet to figure out what else she has done that makes ditching a talented cast of people worthwhile.
And yes, Brian Krakow was a total yutz - it was sort of the point of his character. From what I could tell last night - this guy was pretty much a yutz too. (Typecasting?)
You must understand that I don't recall EVER seeing him on 24 before. He's a throwaway character, so it's not like he's going to be a regular or anything.
TBS
As someone who has worked with many a PhD, I can tell you exactly what PhD means:
Piling it Higher & Deeper.
Sounds about right from DJ's experience...
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